Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Why would Hugh Grant cheat on Elizabeth Hurley?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know who the president of Turkey really is

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I don’t cotton to rapists

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I see through liars

Do Flat Earthers exist today? If so, where do they live?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I can count

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Jenny from Perth writes – my partner is the life of the party, women and men adore him. But at home, he gets angry at us for the silliest reasons and never nice words me or our kids, always putting us down. Should I stay or leave him?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I actually pay taxes

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I can read

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

The International Boxing Association said that Khelif and Lin competing in Paris Olympics were disqualified from the tournament for testing positive for XY chromosomes which give an unfair advantage in the women’s division. What do you think?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

When does a woman know she is cumming?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why would calling me an incel help anything? How does that solve anything? Why can’t you actually be helpful and offer productive honest advice?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How did you get to be a leftist?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Why can't my adopted sister accept she is not part of my family because she isn't related? Why can't she stop calling my parents mum and dad?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

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I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t buy bullshit

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”